Friday, June 19, 2009

It's Friday - You Know What That Means!

And here we go...

1. Thank you for the input re: next week's ultrasound. I ended up calling the hospital to see if they had a policy and they do! Well, sorta. Superfluous family members are allowed in at the very end (after the tech has taken all of the measurements and done all of the thinking required for their job) to see the live-action baby. By that time, we would have already had our Finding Out Moment. I would be okay with my mom coming for that, but instead, she'll be babysitting the boys. She was perfectly happy to have some alone time with her grandsons, so problem solved! We'll show her the disk when we get home and all will be well.

2. Last night as I was laying with Christopher and settling him for bed, I could hear the planes flying overhead. It reminded me of the many many nights I spent at my Nonna and Nonno's house while I was growing up. They live just minutes from the San Francisco airport and we would spend HOURS with the binoculars up to our faces watching the planes land outside of their huge bay window. I have fond memories of hearing the planes coming in late at night or early in the morning as I was drifting off to (or out of) sleep. It was a comfortable feeling, hearing that last night, but it also made me think about how different things are now that I'm grown. Living only an hour away, I no longer have occasion to sleep at their house. To hear the planes coming in. To wake up to Nonna asking if I wanted hotcakes for breakfast, knowing that she already knew the answer. It left me with a little ping on my heart. Trust me when I say that I do realize how blessed I am to still have these two wonderful people as such a constant part of my life.

3. Today Tim signed and returned the offer letter for the new job! It's going to be a new adventure for him, and for that reason we still have our anxieties and apprehensions about it, but I cannot aptly put words to the flood of relief that washed over me when the fax went out this morning. Every breath of this day has been one of thanksgiving. We are truly blessed.

4. Poor little Christopher is WIRED. He's upstairs with Tim this moment saying, "wake up! wake up!" It's 8:30pm. No doubt the entire cup full of M&Ms that the hairdresser gave him during his shift in her chair today is taking its effect. Right on time.

5. My "enter" key has stopped working 9 hits out of 10. The new computer can't come a moment too soon.

6. Do you think that Vince The ShamWow Guy is going to be our kids' Billy Mays? These are the things that consume my mind these days. Billy Mays has been doing infomercials since I was a kid and here's young Vince making sure Camera Guy is following him from ShamWow to SlapChop. Just curious.

7. I decided today that I need a hobby. Scratch that. I need something else that I can put off, add to a list, and then feel guilty for not getting to. You know, along with the laundry, vaccuuming, cleaning the kitchen floor and the bathrooms, finishing Christopher's baby book, starting Jacob's baby book.... But I was thinking about you knitters and Shelby's knitting club and thinking, "I don't do anything." Someone slap some sense into me...and then clean my house.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

It's really more an issue of "Does The Radiology Dept. Have Enough Tissues On Hand For The Tears My Mother Will Shed?"

The other day I was talking to my mom on the phone, an occurrence that repeats itself usually about three or four times in a twenty-four hour period, when she related a conversation that she had with her neighbor. The tail-end of it went a little like this:

Mom: "And I told her that I wouldn't be back in town until Thursday because on WEDNESDAY my daughter gets to find out whether her baby is a boy or a girl....and....maybeI'llgettogoalongonthatappointment."

Me: "Um? Could you repeat that last part?"

Mom: "andmaybei'llgettogoalongonthatappointment? Maybe?"

Now what the heck am I supposed to say to that? This is something that I hadn't even considered. Ever. Not for my mom, and not for Tim's mom (who lives right down the street and has BEEN right down the street for every ultrasound I've had thus far. DOWN THE STREET. NOT IN THE ROOM.) Of course, it had occurred to me that my mom would be in town on that day, and I just figured that she'd stay home with the boys and wouldn't that be exciting to tell her in person this time?

I stammered through a brief, blow-off type of response that went something like, "Oh, Mom, I hadn't even thought of that. Um...I'd have to talk to Tim about it., you know, Tim's parents aren't coming...and maybe that would be a little awkward...and...well, lemmetalktoTimandI'llgetbacktoyou."

Apparently running your words together when you're nervous about the response is an inherited trait.

I figured that the whole "lemme talk to Tim" about it thing would be my way out. I figured that he felt the way that I did - that the Finding Out Ultrasound is a very special and intimate moment to be shared only with your spouse and the Perfect Stranger Technician (although, we always have the same girl, and her son is in my nephew's CCD class, and we've kinda built a relationship through the years.) I feel like the Finding Out Ultrasound is akin to the Delivery Room Reveal, absent the "getting to hold your baby right away" aspect. No one is in the delivery room with us (except the army of doctors in the OR for my c-sections), after all. But it turns out that Tim's take was far different than I'd expected. As usual, his perspective is far broader, far more generous, far more open, and far more loving than mine. (Don't get me wrong, though, I don't think that my feelings on this are selfish- he's just always more generous in these things than I.)

Tim's perspective: It would be a really special moment for my mom to be able to share with me. This is her (perhaps only) opportunity to see an ultrasound like this because thirty years ago they just didn't do it this way. Most likely this is our last baby (which deserves an entirely separate post considering the Catholic Factor and our commitment to NFP and openness to life) and will I regret passing up this opportunity to share such a special moment with her?

See? My husband's major flaw: always thinking of others above himself. Geez.

Now. My response to this was, and remains, that if we invite my mom, we absolutely have to invite his mom. It's all or nothing at this point. Sure, the question could (potentially) be easily solved by calling the hospital and inquiring as to what their policy is on visitors in the ultrasound rooms. They are BIG rooms, so I don't imagine that space would be an issue, but it is very possible that they have rules against inviting the whole town to watch the Baby Movie. (And it really is a Baby Movie. They have a huge LCD screen up on the wall and everything. It's ridiculously deceiving, actually, because the baby always looks like it's eight pounds and ready to be born...even in first trimester ultrasounds.)

I'm sure that, to the reader, my feelings on the matter are clear. I imagine that, because of that, most people would tell me to just follow through with my original inklings. And. Okay. I'll admit that part of the reason that I don't want anyone else in there is that when other people (OKAY AGAIN, specifically my mom. And sometimes Tim's mom.) get emotional, my back goes up and I react by becoming overly stoic. And kinda sarcastic. And pretty annoyed. YES, I DO EXPECT TO HAVE THE MONOPOLY ON EMOTION. AND, YES, I KNOW THAT THIS IS WRONG, BUT I'M PREGNANT SO LEAVE ME ALONE. That being said, my concern is that my inability to deal with their emotion is not a valid reason to not invite them - although, I don't want my childish reaction to others to mar that moment. You know? I hope you do because I really just don't.

And I'm really torn over this. AND I NEED ADVICE. I may not listen to it, but mostly I'm just curious to know what other people would do. So here's the question: Would you want your mother present for your Finding Out Ultrasound? How about your mother-IN-LAW? Do you think that they would want to be there? (I suppose that last one is a silly question.) What would your husband say?

I NEED ANSWERS. Take a poll. Ask people on the street. Ask everyone you know. And then report back here. Inquiring minds want to know. Inquiring pregnant minds want to know or they'll cry. HALP!

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Seven Quick Previews, Saturday Edition.

So I've devised a GENIUS plan to get me to not only get today's (okay, yesterday's) post written, but to also outline prompts AND a schedule of posts for the next week. Okay two weeks. Maybe three. Let's be realistic. FOUR. Out with 7 Quick Takes (for today, anyway) and in with 7 Quick Previews. From what I understand, Quick Takes is meant to be notes about items that just aren't Full Post Worthy; however, I have a bit of a discipline problem when it comes to actually writing posts. And I need a bit of motivation.

And so follows Big Things Happening in the Land of B's & F's to be discussed later:

1.) I need a new laptop. Our current computer has about 1.5 inches of lines running down the monitor, is missing "G" and "Enter" and spends most of its time broadcasting Caillou off of YouTube. We're thinking about making the switch to a Mac, which is a MAJOR LIFE CHANGING EVENT for me; however, I recognize the value of this change and am willing to roll with the tide. Plus, that's what my brother said to do, and when he talks tech, you listen.

2.) Everyone in my bloggy world is writing about sleep these days, and so I figure that I should jump on the bandwagon. I'm a little bit afraid to do this right now, though, because things are actually starting to go well right now. You know that as soon as you open your big fat bloggy mouth about how well your baby is sleeping he starts getting teeth, or an ear infection, or he climbs out of the crib. Sigh. I should just erase this paragraph now before I jinx myself.

3.) Last night as I was sitting downstairs weighing the pros and cons of actually cleaning up the day's toys vs. going to sleep, a commercial came on the On Demand menu (Christopher's viewing of Franklin had come to an end and Tim had whisked him upstairs before he realized what hit him) for High School Musical. And I WAS SINGING ALONG WITH IT. Now, the only thing I know about this movie is this very 30-second preview, but it was enough to plant this thought in my mind: I want to watch it. And I just don't know how I feel about that.

4.) Only 1.5 more weeks until we have our Find Out What Sex The Baby Is Ultrasound and I CAN'T WAIT. And I think it might be a girl. AND I'M ACTUALLY OKAY WITH THAT. (Don't think me too awful of a person.)

5.) I want to go out on a date with my husband. It's been a looong time. We already know where we're going to go and I'm so excited because the last time we went there (and the only time) was the first friday during Lent and I had to order crabcakes. At. A. Steakhouse. I realize that many a fish lover will order fish at a steakhouse without blinking an eye, but some of us do not like fish. Fish are friends. Not food.

6.) There is a man who works in our church whose wife passed away a couple of weeks ago. I did not know her, and I hardly know him except to say hello in passing, but my heart is just broken for him and his family. My norm with things such as this is to send a Mass card and perhaps make a meal to send along, but for whatever reason, I have not gotten around to it yet. Yesterday, during our weekly Friday visit to the rectory HE WAS THERE. He's never there on Fridays. I actually had to TALK to him to express my condolences, which goes against everything in my cowardly being. And I did. Yesterday is the day I became a grown-up.

7.) We've had a lovely experience with our Novena to Saint Rita, about which there are many, MANY things to say. I'll let you ponder what that could mean until I get around to the full story, but it's been so powerful that Tim and I actually talked about giving her a little cred in the baby's name. If it's a girl, of course. I don't think my son would ever forgive me for naming him Rita, do you?